Cynical Me

24 August 2009

Once in a while my unshakable faith in the American people is placed under siege. Most of the time it is the result of external phenomena and other times it is some sort of mental process that takes place in my own mind, usually sparked by personal observations. Well, this is one of those times.
In an apparent attack of cynicism, I have been battling the demon of resentment in my own soul, and I can trace it back to some personal observations and an e-mail I received just few days ago.

Not too long ago, during one of our evening walks with my wife and our dog Jack, I remember pointing out to my wife some of the very few houses in our neighborhood that had the American flag on display. I have the flag flying outside my home at all times, right next to the United States Marine Corps flag, which we fly in honor of our son, and both flags are displayed according to flag etiquette and illuminated at night. On one of those evening walks, I pointed out to my wife that the three houses with the flag permanently displayed did not follow the flag protocol as they were in the dark, but I also pointed out that I would rather see the flag flying, even if dark, than not.
On those national holidays when all Americans should fly Old Glory, the count around the neighborhood maybe goes up by two.
Just couple of evenings ago I sadly noticed that on one of the three houses that flew the flag, the Stars and Stripes had been replaced by a “welcome” banner, one of those silly, better yet stupid banners with no real significance.

Well, couple of days ago I received one of those chain e-mails. More than a chain e-mail, it was one of those electronic epistles calling people to action. The point of the letter was to exhort Americans to fly the flag on 9-11-09 for the anniversary of the worst attack against our country.
I have received a similar letter every year and every year I have dutifully forwarded to all I knew, and every year I could almost noticed the numbers of flags flown diminishing.
So I guess I became the problem, because as I was getting ready to do the forwarding, the indignation I felt for the mere necessity of having to circulate such an e-mail took hold of me and stopped me. I then proceeded to erase the e-mail.
I just felt a deep sense of rancor against that portion of the population that has absolutely no inclination toward feelings of patriotism. Weather on Independence Day or Veterans Day, Patriot’s Day or Memorial Day, there is no feeling toward showing a little that we are proud of being Americans. No indication of the fortune we have been blessed with by being Americans. No slight indication of the gratitude we should feel for those Americans that have endured the sacrifice of wearing the uniform of the Military for the purpose of insuring that the freedom of displaying the flag or not is kept sacred and safe.
So I did not forward the e-mail this year, because I got this overwhelming feeling of disappointment toward the American people. The pride of flying the Stars and Stripes should not have to be asked for, but it should be an automatic action.

Another e-mail I received couple of years ago was reminding people to wear red on Fridays as a sign of support for our Military involved in the War on Terror across the globe. At may place of employment, one of my co-workers even sent a reminder weekly company-wide to observe this small way to show our support. Guess what? Of the nearly 100 employees in the company, only she, another woman and I were the ones wearing red on Friday. After few of these missed opportunities, my co-worker stopped the e-mails and started wearing whatever she wanted, and so did I.
It just got to us that no one else was even thinking about doing something to show support for our troops. So, you can say, we were defeated.

On my vehicles I have stickers that express my pride of being an American and of having a son serving in the US Marines. I have the Blue Star, the American flag and the Marine Corps emblem. And yet, even being on the road a lot, I get few smiles (usually from drivers of cars with the USMC emblem on), more frowns and dirt looks (usually from drivers with Obama stickers on their cars) and a hell of a lot of nothing.
I have a baseball cap with “Marine Dad” on the front, and I wear it a lot, I have t-shirts identifying me as a Marine Dad, my wife has a lapel pin stating “Marine Mom” and yet most people just ignore the messages. I have gotten more people commenting on my “Led Zeppelin” and my Mammoth Lake t-shirts about being fans of the band or have visited the place, than on any of the several Marine Corps t-shirts I like to wear.

It was under these circumstances and thought process that I find myself looking at things with profound cynicism, which is really a new territory for me, as I am by nature a positive thinking person. I am sure that the impending deployment of my Marine son to Afghanistan has a lot to do with my attitude. I feel that I am sharing my son’s safety with a mass of people who could not care less, with people so busy with their personal issues, people so intrigued by the latest celebrity gossip that cannot find the time to acknowledge that there are thousands of our sons and daughters out there in the world, sacrificing at times their own lives to insure the freedom for the American people to be apathetic. And the Military families, with the countless hours of restless sleep or no sleep at all, heart wrenching concerns, hanging on to the hope for that e-mail or phone call just saying “I am ok!”

And I become increasingly cynical about those with access to a soap box, from where they spew their poisonous venom against the Military and their mission, only to score cheap political points. And cynical about those who are using misplaced political power to weaken our country and our National principles in the name of insuring themselves the support of that section of the population dedicated to be leeches to an increasingly overbearing Government.

The emotional conditions I find myself in, as I said, are not familiar to me, so at least I am peeking into my own psyche a little bit more deeply. I know I will return to my usual path sooner rather than later, but I hope that in the meantime I will not negatively impact those around me with my negative energy, as one more thing I learnt these days is that many people out there are what can be called “fair weather friends”.

Let us more than anything keep those serving in the Military so far from home in our thoughts and prayers. That is the least we can do for them.


And these are my thoughts!
Frank “Semperpapa”